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Snail with an attitude

A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can.

Three years later there's a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail.

The snail says: 'What the hell was that all about?'

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Read the sings

A clean house is the sign of a broken internet connection.

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Off to work

A guy shows up late for work. The boss yells, 'You should've been here at 8.30!'

He replies. 'Why? What happened at 8.30?'

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A blind man

A blind man walks into a bar... and a table, and a chair.

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Guess that...

Q: What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it?

A: Envelope.

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