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What do you call a woman who always knows for sure where her husband is?

A widow.

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Lost dog

I used to be in a band, we were called "lost dog". You probably saw our posters.

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You won't find anything more poisonous than a harmonious and friendly group of females.

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Rabbit has fleas

Q: What do you call a rabbit that has fleas?

A: Bugs bunny.

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Dear alcohol. . .

Dear alcohol, We had a deal where you would make me funnier, smarter, and a better dancer...

I saw the video... we need to talk.

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