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The lawyer & his wife


Lawyer's wife: "You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?"

Lawyer: "When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears."

Lawyer's wife: "You see how miraculous and powerful I am for you?"

Lawyer: "Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, 'What other problem can there be greater than this one?'"


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Lost dog


I used to be in a band, we were called "lost dog". You probably saw our posters.


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Rabbit has fleas


Q: What do you call a rabbit that has fleas?

A: Bugs bunny.


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Dear alcohol. . .


Dear alcohol, We had a deal where you would make me funnier, smarter, and a better dancer...

I saw the video... we need to talk.


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Credit card stolen


A man noticed his credit card has been stolen - but he never reported it.

The thief was still spending considerably less than his wife.


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