Tooth said to tongue:
"If I just press you little, you will get cut."
"If I misuse one word, all 32 of you will come out.
Even though he can, naturally, Chuck Norris never swims, the water holds Chuck Norris up.
Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.
They charged one - and let the other one off.
What's a mortgage broker?
A real estate agent without the sense of humour.
They say the surest way to a man's heart is through the stomach. But personally, I find going through the ribcage a lot more efficient.